A PLACE TO CALL HOME
by Dramamama5
Summary: Callen had searched his entire life for a family, only to have it snatched away each and every time. His last attempt resulted in disastrous consequences for all concerned. Now he is finally back where he belongs. The only hurdle remaining is whether or not they can convince him he has finally found that family and 'A Place To Call Home'.
1. Chapter 1

**DISCLAIMER:**** I will post this here in the first chapter only. but it extends to every chapter that is posted from here on out. (hint: not as long as the others… just saying.) I do not own any of the characters of NCIS LA! I am merely borrowing them for just a little while. There is mention of characters that I have created and that do belong to me. Any characters or names of characters that sound familiar to someone living, dead or otherwise… is completely coincidental and unintentional. Thank you.**

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**** Hi there! Well, here we are… this is basically the Christmas story I wrote back in the late fall, right before I began posting "Phoenix Rising". I just couldn't post it until that one was finished. So, as it turns out… this one is a little late. However, better late than never… I hope. HA**

**For those just finding this one. Once again, this can be read as a stand alone but does feed off of the last four stories. I hope if you like this one and have not, as yet, read my others… that you will take the time to do so now. All of my stories, since the beginning, have interconnected in one way or another… yet all could be read independently. The last four stories are the only ones really needing to be read in the proper order. OK… moving on…. Please do me the honor of taking a moment at the end of each chapter and leave a review. They are so very much appreciated. Should you feel the need, please make any criticisms constructively. Thank you!**

The months following Callen's return to the team were fraught with complications. Callen was having to start from the beginning in order to find the rhythm of the team, re-create their friendships from the ground up. The hardest for them all was Callen's having to reign in his temper. Locking his Renegade persona, "The Ghost" away, was proving far more difficult than anyone cared to admit and because of that, connecting with his team proved problematic at best.

"Callen!" Sam yelled as Callen stormed past the bullpen and headed straight for the gym.

"Well, that's never a good sign," Deeks stated to no one in particular as he and Kensi reached the bottom of the steps from the Ops Center.

"Not now, Sam!" Callen yelled back over his shoulder, followed by the sound of the gym door slamming against the wall.

What's going on Sam?" Kensi asked.

Sam let out a heavy sigh as he ran a hand over his face.

"We found Miller."

"That's a good thing, so why would that make Callen so mad?" Deeks asked confused.

"He's dead."

"No! Does his wife know?" Kensi asked.

"Yes…"

"Oh… you and…" Kensi answered her own question.

"Yeah and he believes if we'd just pushed Grayson harder, he would have given us what we needed in order to save Miller in time."

"Translation, beat it out of him…" Deeks offered.

"Something like that…"

"He seemed to be doing better with that." Kensi stated worriedly.

"I don't know. It's two steps forward and three steps back. He just feels like his hands are being tied and he's letting people down… like Miller's wife and kids." Sam explained.

"It really hasn't been that long, Sam… maybe cut him some slack," Deeks encouraged.

"It's been nearly six months, Deeks." Sam replied in frustration.

"Yeah, and he was a Renegade agent for nearly four years. Trying to tuck away those darker aliases was never easy for him…. I get that… Max Gentry is always right beneath the skin's surface, ready to take charge, if and when I'm willing to loosen the reigns… That is just one alias. How many aliases like that does Callen have? Now add this "Ghost" persona and I can't begin to imagine…" Deeks offered.

"I guess." Sam finally agreed, "I had just hoped we would have been farther down this path by now."

"I just wish we could have the old Callen back." Kensi said, walking back to her desk.

Deeks pat Sam's shoulder before turning back towards his own desk.

"Rubbing his neck, he leaned his head back catching Hetty's concerned gaze as she looked down from the balcony at the top of the stairs.

He shook his head as he made his way up to join her.

"I take it things did not end well."

"Nope, didn't make it in time to save the guy… we just got back from informing his wife. G's mad as hell because he feels we could have saved him had we pushed Grayson harder than we did."

"Ah… and is that the case, Mr. Hanna? Could you have saved him?" Hetty asked, looking over at the man next to her leaning over the railing.

"What? Maybe… I don't know. We were already pushing the boundaries as it was. I'd hate to think what G would have done had I not stopped it."

"Was he out of control?" Hetty looked out across the building.

"No, actually he was very calm and methodical." Sam replied, "I'm kinda surprised the guy didn't confess more. G is damn intimidating. I can't imagine how scary he must have been when he did this for the Renegades."

"You don't want to know." Hetty stated, her tone indicating she knew more than she wanted to in regards to Callen's time away, "How has he been in the field?"

"Fine. He's intense sometimes but he stays in check. Like I said, calm and methodical."

"It's a slow process… coming back from where he's been… living in the shadows, dealing with the worst of the worst." Hetty explained.

"He never talks about it. There are times when I look at him and I know he's caught up in that head of his but… Does he ever talk to you?" Sam asked, glancing in Hetty's direction.

"No," Hetty answered, shaking her head, "we're still working through things. Like everything else, he will eventually lock it away in the back of his mind… which, while infuriating as it may be for us, it is that very thing that no doubt kept him sane over the past five years."

"I know… it's just… I worry about him."

"We all do, Mr. Hanna. I will see you tomorrow… I will speak with our Mr. Callen."

"Night Hetty," Sam pushed away from the railing to head back down to the bullpen.

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"Rough day, Mr. Callen," Hetty stated more than asked.

"Didn't have to be," he growled, continuing his attack on the latest in a long line of punching bags.

"No, I don't suppose so… However, you did do everything within your ability to save Mr. Miller, did you not?" Hetty asked, ready for the battle ahead.

"No, Hetty, I didn't! I could have gotten the information we needed from Grayson had I…" Callen started.

"beaten him to a pulp?" Hetty looked over her glasses, brows raised.

"not been restricted in my efforts," Callen stated.

"I needn't remind you, yet again, that you work for NCIS now and right or wrong, there are rules and protocols we must follow."

"Rules that in cases like this make no sense." Callen stated.

"Maybe not, but never the less, we are required to follow them. Within those parameters, did you do all that you could to save him?" Hetty asked.

"Yes, but…" Callen answered.

Hetty held a finger up in the air to silence him.

"Then you did your job." Hetty stated, "We can't save them all."

"That's little comfort to his wife and kids, Hetty. Every Christmas, from this day forward will be nothing more than a sick reminder of their father's murder." Callen growled, "It didn't have to be that way!"

Hetty watched as he continued his exhausting assault. There it was… Christmas… the time of year when his demons came out to play and today's loss only added to that long list of reasons he avoided the holidays.

"Perhaps not, but you don't know that for sure and you do no one, especially yourself, any favors by dwelling on it. "Go home… wherever that is these days and rest. Tomorrow is another day." Hetty responded. As she moved to leave, she stopped and turned back, "Oh, and might I just add that at the rate you and Mr. Hanna are going through punching bags, we will likely go bankrupt by years end!"

Callen paused only briefly in order to catch his breath and answer, "I'll pay for the next one."

"I'll remember you said that, Mr. Callen… now clean yourself up while I pour us some scotch!" she called back over her shoulder.

Callen slowed to a halt as he grabbed the towel, she'd brought him and wiped the sweat from his eyes. He shook his head as the door clanged shut behind the invite.

That was one of the few things to go back to normal upon his return. He wasn't unhappy to be back exactly but the struggle to revert back to the roll of an NCIS agent was proving far more tedious than he cared to admit.

The thing that surprised him the most was that Hetty was the only reason he was staying even remotely sane at this point. She had unwittingly pulled him back from the edge of jumping ship several times. He still didn't trust her fully. She continued to hold tightly to her secrets regarding his past… but she proved more than once that she cared for him. If nothing else, she fought for him and that meant something, considering his father wasn't willing to do the same.


	2. Chapter 2

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**** Hi there! Thank you to all the readers out there, willing to give my story a chance. Thank you to everyone who took the time to favorite, follow, and review. You have no idea what a wonderful surprise it is to find those reviews waiting…. Okay, here is chapter two… Shall we see what everyone is into now? Remember the two R's... READ and REVIEW. Catch you tomorrow.**

Sam slipped into his desk the next morning and took a quick sip of his awaiting coffee before greeting his fellow team mates.

"Good morning, Sam. The kids get in okay?" Kensi asked.

"They did… Kamran insisted we needed to decorate last night. She hadn't even unpacked her stuff before she had the tree out and waiting for lights!" he grinned.

"Seriously?" You haven't invested in a pre-lit tree yet?" Deeks asked, leaning back in his chair.

"Kamran won't let me. She is so much like her mother. She always said 'The lights are the man's job'. Of course, she would ultimately redo them once my back was turned so the bulbs would be more evenly distributed." Sam's voice grew melancholy.

Kensi saw the sadness from his loss creep onto his features and looked at Marty as she began to speak, "So, don't forget Christmas. You and the kids are coming over for a Deeks and Blye holiday dinner."

"Right!" Sam rallied his mood, "wouldn't miss it… seriously, the kids wouldn't let me forget it." he laughed.

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Hetty placed the phone back in its cradle after touching base with Leon Vance. She leaned back in her chair and watched her team as they started their day. Her eyes were drawn to the lone figure standing up above in the shadowy alcove of the balcony over the bullpen listening to the laughter of this team mates as they no doubt were planning their holidays… standing where he believed himself unseen. Hetty could see the strain of the past six months… the struggle to find his place. She had thought it best to leave things to happen naturally but it appeared that wasn't working and she would need to help things along. She had just spent the last thirty minutes on the phone updating Leon Vance about the team. Leon suggested closing down the OSP early for Christmas but now Hetty was of the mind that this may not be the best idea after all. Perhaps simply shutting down the mission aspect would be enough.

By the time she had made her decision and sent word of her revised plans back to Leon, Callen had receded further into the shadows, only to reappear moments later coming down the hall.

"Hey, Callen." Sam greeted as Callen passed his desk.

"Sam." Came the return as he took his computer out and started it up. "Thanks for the coffee, Kensi."

"My pleasure…"

"So, Callen… Christmas..." Deeks started.

"What about it?" Callen asked, already dreading the answer.

"You got any plans?" Deeks finished, shooting a look over to Sam who simply rolled his eyes and shook his head. They all knew what to expect next.

Callen didn't even look up, "Nope".

"Would you like some?" he asked light heartedly and was only slightly surprised by his response.

"Nope".

"Callen, come on. It's your first Christmas back home…" Deeks responded.

Callen couldn't help but feel something… he wasn't sure what, exactly… at the mention of home. "So, you know how I feel about it. It's simply no big deal. Seriously, the last one we did was exhausting for everyone, don't you think?" Callen answered honestly, "As far as I am aware, that is not how the holidays are supposed to feel."

Sam didn't stop the chuckle that bubbled up, "You haven't had kids and in-laws," he glanced over at his partner before emphasizing the rest of his remark, "eeexxxxhaaauuusting".

Callen just shook his head with a smirk, "Go. Enjoy your holidays."

"What did you do for all the Christmases you were gone?" Kensi asked, regretting the question even as she asked it. She was surprised when he actually leaned back in his chair as if to give it serious thought.

"Last year I spent it with Alex and Jake." He started and no one spoke. Callen rarely spoke of the missing years. "The year before, I was at Gibbs… more as a favor to Abby than anything." He chuckled, then, at the memory of Abby's exuberance. "She talked Gibbs and me into helping at a homeless shelter. I told her that was more up your ally, Marty." Callen thought a moment. As he began to think of the few Christmases prior, his features sobered and they knew he'd be sharing no further.

"Callen?" Kensi urged.

"Nothing to tell about the rest. I worked, best we leave it at that." Callen grumbled moodily.

"But why spend this one alone? You obviously had a few good ones. Our moms are doing the cooking and you know how good their food is."

Callen smiled briefly and spoke without anger, "Kensi, I appreciate what you're trying to do, but… understand, nothing has changed for the better since I left. I still don't see the importance in doing Christmas." Seeing the look on her face and knowing he was the cause, Callen found himself reconsidering, "Okay, look… I'll think about it. No promises!"

"Yes! That's great!" Kensi laughed as she scooted her chair over to give him a hug, taking him by surprise.

"She didn't hear the no promise part." Deeks chuckled.

"Nope" Sam agreed with a wide grin of his own.

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"Hetty, what's with the case load? Eric said we're in stand down."

"Yes, Mr. Callen, Director Vance put the order thru this morning… This bothers you, why?" Hetty asked curiously.

Callen's eyes narrowed… "Why? Is this about yesterday?"

"No," she shook her head for emphasis, "but now that you mention it… would it be such a bad idea? You've been burning the candle at both ends since you came back to work."

"I don't make the cases, Hetty." Callen smirked as he leaned against the entry post to her office.

"Fair enough, but I have to wonder if your long personal work hours happen to have anything to do with avoiding time with your team." She suggested, leaning back to look at him.

"I'm with them every day… ALL day." He stated emphatically.

"In work capacity only." She agreed.

"Isn't that enough?" Callen asked, already knowing the answer he would receive.

"No, Mr. Callen. How do you expect to get this team back to what it once was if you don't at least try to connect with them?"

"What do you want me to do, Hetty? I'm trying. I can't be a part of their incessant bantering." He answered.

"Incessant bantering? Why not? You used to be quite good at it, as I recall." Hetty thought back to the days before Blackguard, when most mornings, the bullpen was filled with laughter and joking. She longed for it, now. So long as that was missing, the OSP would not function the same as it always had. Their ability to banter back and forth was the indicator for the rest of the OSP that all was well.

"Why not?" Callen asked, as if the answer should be obvious.

"Yes, Mr. Callen, why not?" Hetty reiterated, "I realize it has been a difficult transition in many ways, and I know this time of year is especially challenging…"

"Not if people would just let things be." Callen interrupted.

"You mean, let you suffer in silence?" Hetty challenged.

"Come on, Hetty. Are you seriously going to sit there and tell me the last one you all roped me into wasn't a complete and utter fiasco? You really want to go there again?" he asked.

"I don't remember it that way. I saw it as a break through, of sorts. It ended with smiles and laughter… and pie, as I recall." Hetty smiled.

Callen thought back to that Christmas, so long ago now. It did end on a good note. One that would later prove to be a false one.

Hetty watched as he stood quietly in thought. She could almost read his thoughts as the unbidden emotion crossed his face. She knew the moment his face showed such intense sadness that it could only come from thinking of Michelle and how she had done so much for him… especially that Christmas. She also knew he had never truly had the opportunity to deal with that loss and like all the many others he had suffered through in his life, he would simply pocket it away and leave it for a time when he could deal with it alone… always alone.

"Callen".

The softness of her voice and the relaxed use of his name pulled him back but not before his thoughts had fallen on all the reasons he had chosen not to do Christmas.

"Christmas is a time of reflection and sharing memories… I don't think you or the team really want me doing that." Callen answered.

"Why not?" she asked expectantly.

"Hetty… just a few short years ago, I was sitting in that Russian coffee shop on Christmas eve. While everyone was laughing and celebrating with family and friends, I was waiting for my mark to show up. It was just business as usual. It was an easy job at least." Callen shrugged, "It's just another day, Hetty… no more, no less."

Hetty tried not to dwell on just how matter of fact he was in regards to his previous employment. "That's where you are wrong. It is also a time to be with those who care about you. Yes, a lot of unfortunate things have occurred but the one thing you need to know is just how many people would love to spend time with you at Christmas. You have touched so many lives and they are the better for it, regardless of what you try to tell yourself."

"Hetty, I appreciate what you are trying to do, but I just think everyone is better off if I just don't get involved in their Christmas celebrations." Callen affirmed.

Hetty sighed deciding to let the argument drop for the moment. "Very well… if that's how you feel."

Callen's brows furrowed as he looked at the small woman. He knew better than to think she would let this drop.

"You have reports to finish before the holiday break, do you not?"

"A few."

"Then I suggest you get to it." She shooed him off…

"We still on for dinner Sunday?" Callen asked suddenly.

With a smile, Hetty responded, "That is the plan. I thought a nice roast with vegetables sounded good."

"Works for me." Callen agreed, "Same time as always?"

"Actually, do you think you could come a little sooner? Ten o'clock perhaps?"

"Oh… sure, not a problem." He replied.

"In fact, do you even have a place to stay the weekend?" she asked then.

"Hetty," Callen started, his tone was one of warning.

"It's a simple question. Protocol states you are to keep me updated as to your current residence." Hetty admonished.

"I'm in between places at the moment." Callen remarked defensively.

"Well then… for the weekend, at least, you are not homeless. You can come stay at Dovecote with me."

"Hetty."

"Let's not make an issue, shall we? I will expect you for dinner this evening… I will even go so far as to make you beef stroganoff." Hetty offered.

Callen allowed a rare smile to brighten his features, "Well, I'd hate to let a perfectly good stroganoff go to waste."

"Beef stroganoff? Where? You know how I love a good stroganoff." Deeks stated, having overheard Callen as he passed Hetty's office.

Callen's eyes rolled upward before squeezing them shut in frustration, causing Hetty to chuckle.

"Sorry, didn't mean to interrupt." Deeks stated as he turned to leave.

Hetty said nothing as Callen caught her gaze. With a sigh and another roll of his eyes, he stopped Deeks' retreat, "Hetty's house tonight, for dinner. Tell the others."

"Yeah? Cool." Deeks replied as he moved toward the bullpen.

Callen turned back to Hetty with an unamused smirk, "Quite the coincidence, don't you think… Deeks right within earshot as you mention your choice of food."

"Mr. Callen, you give me too much credit." Hetty replied in mock surprise.

"Do I now… really?" Callen stated more than asked.

Hetty didn't reply to the reference at hand but shooed Callen on his way, "Reports, on my desk by the end of the day… and Mr. Callen, don't be late for dinner."

His eye narrowed slightly with the smallest of grins and a shake of his head as he followed Deeks path back to his desk.

Hetty watched as he headed back to the bullpen, catching Sam's eye and questioning look. She leaned forward and chuckled as she returned her attentions to her own work.


	3. Chapter 3

**AUTHOR'S NOTE****: Happy Monday! I would assume you have all watched the "wedding episode"... Whether you loved the Densi drama or whether you hated it... I thought they did a fabulous job with it... bringing Hetty back via a car crashing through a wall was poetic! ANYHOOO! They were behind the times when it comes to my stories, eh? They are old married folk now. LOL I have thought about going back and doing a little one shot on just that day... but now... I don't think it would work with the episode last night. Lost opportunities... (kinda like all the ones they missed with Callen's character over the years.) Just sayin'. Well, here is chapter three. Please read and review! Thanks to all who have taken the time to do so and for the follows and favorites! **

The rest of the team had headed out early in order to freshen up before heading to Hetty's.

"Here you go." Callen laid the hefty pile of reports on Hetty's desk.

"My, an early Christmas gift or a Christmas miracle?" she teased. She was rewarded with a smile in return.

"Shall we head home?" she asked, closing her computer while not missing the look that crossed his face, "What bothers you, Mr. Callen? Is it the reminder that while you insist upon living on the streets, you are never homeless? You will always have a home at Dovecote." Hetty reminded him. She had frequently offered him the use of her Dovecote residence as a more permanent home or simply a place to go when needed. She had also given him free access to the beach house. She knew when he came back from undercover missions that he needed time to pocket certain aliases and decompress before dealing with anyone… the beach offered him that escape.

"Hetty, for one, I don't live on the streets and I don't consider myself homeless either." Callen argued.

"Really, then what do you call it?" Hetty asked, bemused.

"I live the life of a minimalist." He answered.

"Even minimalists have a home with a bed." Hetty challenged.

Callen sighed, "I'm still looking."

"We have been down this road before… you have a key to the beach house and now you have a key to Dovecote."

"Hetty, no." Callen tried to refuse the key.

"Do not argue with me, Mr. Callen. I can't have my lead agent wandering the streets every night looking for a boarding house or some such place. I need you rested. At least you have a choice and no one else knows… so you are free to come and go and know that you will have your privacy." Hetty put the extra key into his hand, closing his fingers over it and giving it a pat before turning to gather her things.

"Hetty, thank you but I will be fine… I promise, I'm looking and I will find something."

"You aren't getting any younger, Mr. Callen. It's time to retire THAT THING you pass off as a bed," she pointed to the bedroll he carried with a pinched expression and a sniff.

Callen grinned at the familiarity in the response.

"Shall I drive?" she asked.

Knowing it left him no transportation, he sighed, "sure."

Hetty smiled as she led the way out of the building.

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They had been home for nearly an hour when their company began arriving.

"Can you let them in and show them to the living room? I can't step away just now." Hetty asked lightly.

"Yeah, sure." Callen got up from his seat at the counter.

"Be a proper host and offer our guests a drink, won't you?"

"Yes, mam," he shook his head at the instruction… some things never changed and sometimes he was okay with it.

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"Hey, G," Sam greeted as he opened the door.

"Sam… Aiden, Kam…" Callen returned, "When did you get back into town?"

"They got here yesterday afternoon." Sam replied.

"Hi, Uncle Callen," Kamran offered, giving him a hug.

"Hey, Banana Hanna." Callen returned the hug, relieved the familiar greeting made her smile. He'd never admit just how hard it was to call her that after him time with Iosif Romanoff and the fact the man had known it and used it to taunt him. Despite knowing the man was dead, it still chilled his spine at the thought of what they man had planned for the young girl.

"Everything okay, G?" Sam asked quietly, noticing the change in his demeanor.

"What? Oh, yeah… no, I'm fine. Come on in. Living room is through there, but you know that." Callen invited as the others joined them, "Hey Deeks, Kensi… Come on in Eric, Nell."

"Hey Callen, I know Hetty said not to bring anything but Nell and I decided you can never have too much dessert." Kensi flashed a big smile that garnered a rare but genuine smile in return. Kensi had always loved his smile and regretted the fact that it was so seldom seen.

"Kitchen is that way," he directed the women.

"Cool. Go join the boys, we'll bring some drinks in."

"You sure?" he asked.

"Yeah, no worries," Nell encouraged.

Callen accepted with a nod and turned for the living room.

Kensi and Nell joined Hetty in the large gourmet kitchen, "It smells wonderful in here!" Kensi greeted.

"Yeah, my stomach started growling… LOUDLY, the minute I stepped through the door and smelled your cooking." Nell agreed.

"Thank you, ladies… you make me blush. Dessert, I presume?" Hetty stated as she accepted the girl's offerings. "Mr. Callen has failed to return for the drinks, "she remarked, looking toward the doorway.

"That's our fault. We told him we would bring them in with us."

"Oh, that's fine… I would guess they would prefer beer… except for Mr. Hanna… however, he will just have to settle for now," Hetty chuckled, "they are chilling in the refrigerator."

"First, we wanted to talk to you about Christmas…" Kensi stated, hesitantly.

"I see. Am I to presume this has something to do with our Mr. Callen?" Hetty asked.

Both girls nodded, "Do you know if he has decided to come or not?" Kensi asked.

"As of our last conversation, the answer to that would be a no… I'm afraid not. Holiday demons are out in full force." Hetty smiled sadly.

"Really? Hetty, he NEEDS to be there." Kensi replied.

"And why, pray tell, is that?" Hetty asked curiously. She had begun to suspect that her little band of misfits were up to something over the course of the past few months but was never quite sure what it was. She did, however, notice that their discussion began and ended with Callen's coming and goings.

Kensi and Nell shared a look and was about to answer when Deeks bounded into the room, "Hello Ladies!" he greeted, noticing the expectant look on their faces, "What? What did I do?" He asked.

"Mr. Deeks, you are just in time. Your wife and Miss Jones were about to explain why it is so necessary for Mr. Callen to be present at your Christmas gathering this year."

"Ah, that. Okay. So, I'm going out on a limb and guess he isn't coming." Deeks surmised.

Hetty let a grin escape her lips before sobering once more.

"No, I'm afraid as yet, he has convinced himself it is for the best. Miss Jones, perhaps you would be so kind as to take this tray into the other room and inform the others that dinner will be ready shortly and that Mr. and Mrs. Deeks are helping me here."

"Uh, sure." Nell accepted the tray and with a last look of support in Kensi's direction, she headed down the hall.

"Now, perhaps you could explain to me what the lot of you are cooking up this time." Hetty set her gaze on the young couple, expectantly.

"Uh, well…" Deeks stammered nervously, "You see… we have this bar…"

Kensi just shook her head, it never ceased to amaze her how quickly her husband turned into a nervous mess when Hetty was around. "The bar's renovations are basically done. Roberta will be our manager while we are working." Kensi started.

"What does that have to do with Mr. Callen, exactly?" Hetty asked, "Are you planning to offer him the job of bouncer?" Hetty smirked as she noticed the 'deer in the headlights' look coming from Marty Deeks, who in turn let out a nervous cackle before recovering with a flick of his head to clear the hair from his eyes.

"What? No… Bouncer? No, of course not… not that he couldn't do the job… I mean… Sam is more the look of a bouncer… not that I'm saying we would ask him… what I'm saying is…", Deeks looked between the two women who simply sported bemused grins as he struggled to dig himself out of the hole he had, presently, dug himself into. Taking a deep steadying breath as he rolled his eyes to the ceiling, he tried again. So… there is space above the bar. We all got together and turned it into an apartment." Deeks finished.

A look of understanding softened Hetty's features, "Why am I only now just hearing of this? Did you not think I might like to throw in with you?"

"Well, we weren't sure you'd approve and... well... ," Deeks offered with a shrug.

"Anyway, Callen needs a real home SOMEPLACE, and since he gave up the only place he ever really felt safe enough to stay put in here, we thought this was one way we could give back even a little of what he gave to us." Kensi finished.

"The apartment is done and ready for him. We want to give it to him on Christmas." Deeks added.

"I see." Hetty replied with a tender smile.

She was proud of her team. Once more they had walked through the fire, survived, and then rallied… pulling closer together than before. It had been a rocky year. What they now offered their friend and team leader could possibly prove to be the final link that would solidify the chain of friendship that now bound them.

"Well, my dears, perhaps you might find a moment to invite him once more…" Hetty suggested.

"I have already asked him, but if you think he will listen…" Kensi shrugged, casting a glance at her husband.

"Sometimes, it's not what you say but how and when you choose to say it." Hetty stated, looking Kensi pointedly in the eye, "Now, if you would help me carry dinner to the table, we can eat. Mr. Deeks, would you be so kind as to gather the others?"

"Sure," Marty replied, heading down the hall.


	4. Chapter 4

**AUTHOR'S NOTE****: Nothing really to say, I guess. Thanks for those who reviewed, you have no idea what it means to me, to be able to chat about the story. So, I will leave you to it and hope you take a moment to leave a review when you have finished… and remember to keep any criticisms constructive in nature.**

The meal went quickly enough and the conversation flowed nicely. Hetty watched as Callen slowly relaxed into the evening… spurring her to moved forward with her plan.

Clearing her throat to get their attention… "I have a favor to ask. Since you are all here, I am a bit behind in my decorating…"

"I was wondering where the mistletoe was", Deeks grinned at his wife as Kensi smiled back and shook her head.

"Yes, well," Hetty continued, "Would you all be willing to help me this evening?"

"YES!" Kamran shouted excitedly. "Can we, daddy?" she pleaded, "They wouldn't even put a tree up, if I didn't insist." She told the others, making Sam wince with guilt.

A sad testament to Michelle's absence in the home. Callen glanced at Sam as he shifted nervously. The holidays had lost much of their joy for him when Michelle died… He would get so caught up in his own feelings, he hadn't realized just how much it had affected the kids.

"Yeah, baby, sure. We can do that." Sam replied with a smile.

There were similar responses from the others ending with a sigh of resignation from Callen.

"Good, good… Now, if the ladies could help me in the kitchen, perhaps the gentlemen could get the decorations? Mr. Callen, you remember where I keep them?" she asked gauging his answer.

He looked at her, his eyes narrowed slightly, before the familiar smirk appeared, "Yes… Hetty, I remember."

"Good," she answered with a smirk of her own, "Shall we?" she turned to the girls as they began gathering dishes.

Callen took them through the house and up to the attic…

Aiden looked around in awe, "You lived here with Hetty?"

"For three years and then the occasional visits." Callen answered, not looking back.

"Didn't you get scared sleeping up here all alone?" Aiden asked as they reached the third floor.

Callen considered the question. He remembered back to those years. They were treasured memories of when he felt the safest. He wasn't sure if that hadn't scared him more than the streets when it came right down to it.

"Nah, after all the foster homes and time living on the streets… this place was a relief." He replied.

"Wow! Coolest attic EVER!" Aiden stated, making Callen chuckle.

"It is, isn't it?" Callen replied softly as he looked around the space, occasionally lifting a lid on a box here and there.

"Lucky,"

Callen didn't respond. He didn't need to. It was evident by the look in his eyes that he felt the same. Sam and Deeks cast a look in each other's direction.

"Here they are," he called.

Deeks looked around at the boxes of Christmas decorations, "All of this?" he breathed.

"Oh, well…" Callen stopped to consider the question seriously and then shrugged, "When I was a kid, she would decorate the entire house. Huge tree… the banisters would be wrapped in garland, the doorways too. The fireplaces were all decorated and lights were everywhere. The whole place smelled of pine."

"Speaking of banisters… you ever sail down all those steps on them?" Aiden asked with a curious grin.

"Why? What have you heard?" Callen asked, looking over at Aiden like a boy caught with his hand in the cookie jar. This perked the interest of Eric, who had been busy thinking of that very thing on their climb up. To think of their fearless yet stoic leader doing anything of the sort just seemed so unlikely that he eagerly awaited his reply. Eric wasn't the only one now intrigued.

"Oh, well… the official answer is, no, I would never pull such an idiotic and dangerous stunt." He answered seriously, looking through the boxes.

Once again, Sam and Deeks exchanged amused glances.

Aiden wasn't ready to let it go, however. He had plans of his own, "and the UNofficial answer?" he asked with a grin.

"Refer to the official answer," he replied without so much as a blink, "Come on, start grabbing boxes," Callen returned the grin as he pushed a couple boxes into the boy's hands.

"Yeah, okay, but if it had been me, I would have." Deeks chuckled, grabbing boxes up.

"You would," Sam said, shaking his head with a smile.

It took several trips but they eventually got them all… Callen began systematically going through boxes until he found the first of the tree lights.

"Here." He handed them to Sam.

"What? You think I'm stringing that thing?" Sam exclaimed.

"Yeah, I do. I hear Kam already has you warmed up." Callen replied, "You can start while I find the rest."

"The rest? There's more?" Eric whined.

"She likes lights, Eric," Callen stated, not looking up from the box he was digging through, "I'm going back up to see if there's a box we forgot."

"Great…" Sam muttered, "Hey! This better not be your way of ducking out on your share of decorating, G!" he yelled after him.

"Hey, big guy… at least they aren't tangled." Deeks teased.

"Well, then, YOU should have NO trouble stringing them up." Sam replied as he dropped them into Deeks arms.

"Me?! Why me? He gave YOU the job," Deeks squeaked.

"Because I already strung one tree and since you admittedly cheated by buying a pre-lit tree, it's your turn." Sam answered.

"That'll teach you to brag," Eric laughed.

"Oh yeah? Well you're helping, so get up there, game boy." Deeks retorted.

"Ch, you guys are sad," Aiden tossed a hand back at them as he exited the room to follow Callen upstairs.

"And just where do you think you're going?" Sam asked his son.

"Going to see if Uncle G needs help." He answered innocently.

"Sure you aren't planning on trying out the banister?" his dad quirked an eyebrow at him.

"What? I would never pull such an idiotic and dangerous stunt!" Aiden recited the answer Callen had given him earlier before chuckling, and with a shrug, gave his own answer to the question, "maybe."

"Not without me!" Deeks called out, tossing the lights at Eric and following the boy.

"And I'M the game boy?" Eric muttered as Sam got up to help him with a sigh.


	5. Chapter 5

**AUTHOR'S NOTE****: Good afternoon… Perhaps spring WILL show itself yet. Well, not a lot of reviews soooo not sure what that means. Bums me just a little, but thank you to those who did take the time. I really do appreciate getting to read what you are thinking in regards to the path of the story. With that thought in mind, I think this chapter will make you happy… Hopefully, it will ring true to character. HA. If you aren't in too much of a hurry, please be kind and review when you finish.**

Callen chuckled as he heard them bickering over the lights. He knew it was all in good fun and he found it oddly reassuring. A call back to simpler times, maybe?

As Callen reached the third floor, he looked around the landing. This floor was much smaller, with only a landing separating the two rooms, and then the door leading to the attic above.

When Callen had moved to Dovecote as a boy, Hetty had given him free range of the third floor to do as he please… but his favorite place had been the attic.

When things got to be too much and he was struggling to get through school and the trouble that came with that, he'd escape to the attic and all its many treasures.

"Living here had to be so much fun," Aiden stated, coming up behind him.

Callen chuckled, "It had its moments."

"Did you seriously sleep up here all alone?"

"Yep," was his only reply.

"Why didn't you stay on the second floor where Hetty was?" he asked curiously.

"Even as a kid, I didn't sleep. I spent most nights, wandering the halls. So, this allowed Hetty to sleep. Spent a lot of time in the attic. Hetty never complained about my nosing around… but eventually she created an extra space for me in this room here to draw me out."

"Yeah? What did she do? Buy you a Big TV? He asked, eyeing the door.

"Ha, no. she made it into a workshop full of electronics. Things I could safely tear apart." Callen explained, "I guess she got tired of me tearing apart her kitchen appliances… among other things that I hadn't been so great to get put back together quite right. First time I took the toaster apart… I got it back together just before she came down to make breakfast. Seems I turned it into a projectile weapon."

"Nice." Aiden laughed at the thought, "Sounds cool, can I see? Or did she turn it into a bedroom, now?"

"What? You mean to tell me you didn't go snooping when you stayed here?" Callen teased.

"Actually… the door was locked and I couldn't pick it." Aiden admitted.

"Does your dad know just how much you and your sister get into?" Callen asked.

"You're joking, right?" Aiden laughed.

Callen grinned as he walked over and tried the door. Finding it locked, he walked to the corner of the room and bent down and removed the cover from the register and reached… pulling out a key.

"Are you kidding me?" Aiden spoke in awe.

Callen just smirked as he opened the door and walked through.

"Uncle G! This place is so cool!"

Callen looked around the room. He was surprised to find everything pretty much the same as when he left it. Though it was obvious Hetty had been in the room as everything had been dusted and cleaned. It also appeared she had updated the electronics. He would have to check it out later.

"Whoa!" Came a very familiar voice from behind.

"Hey, Deeks."

"Callen. What is this place?" Deeks asked.

"Hetty made it for him as a kid." Aiden answered for him.

"No way! Lucky dog!" Deeks stated as Callen looked back with his brows raised, "This is going to make Eric so jealous! Bet his toy room wasn't this cool!" he finished.

Moving back towards the attic as he fingered the key in his hand. Deeks didn't miss the gesture. "She must have really cared about you… and from the looks of things, still does." Deeks spoke softly as he walked just a step behind him.

Callen glanced at him over his shoulder as he pocketed the key for later use, "Yeah… she was pretty great as a foster parent."

"Foster parent? You are kidding yourself if you think you were just another foster kid to the old girl… You are like a son to her… That room is something a parent does for their child." Deeks stated.

Callen's brows furrowed in thought as he climbed the steps. He and Hetty had been close and he'd be lying if at times he didn't look on her as a mother figure… but he never envisioned she returned that feeling.

"Old Girl, Deeks?" Callen smirked.

"What? No, did I say that out loud? What I meant to say was..." Deeks stammered, "Hey! I meant that endearingly." He called after them.

"Sure, you did." Callen replied, holding back the grin that beckoned.

"Ahhhh, come ON! You aren't going to tell her, are you? Not till after Christmas… Please?" he begged, "Callen… Buddy?"

Callen shoved a box in Deeks hands with a smile that lit his eyes, "What makes you think she doesn't already know?"

Aiden let out a laugh at the look of shock that had left Deeks pale and his eyes wide.

"NO! You think? Callen? You're joking, right? Callen?" Deeks replied as he followed the other two down the steps as he heard them laughing at his discomfort, "meh, it was worth it," he decided.

As they descended the stairs to the second floor, Aiden hopped up onto the railing and sailed past Callen down the stairs. "Come on, Uncle G! For old times' sake."

Callen grinned at the bold move and with a shrug, he gave in and for one moment the boy who had once resided within these halls came out to play and followed the young Hanna down the steps.

"Ah, come on! Not fair!" Deeks bellowed after them, burdened with carrying the box.

They both glided down the staircase with ease, hopping off at the bottom only to be met by Hetty, Kensi, Nell, and Kamran.

"Really, Mr. Callen? I would have thought you'd have grown out of such juvenile behavior by now." Hetty admonished, attempting to hide her surprise.

Callen cleared his throat as he sobered his features to the chastisement… yet his eyes remained the vibrant blue that lit up his entire face… the look of the young boy who had so long ago attempted this and many other fetes that ended up with him at the wrong end of a lecture from the small woman.

"It was Aiden's idea." Callen offered in way of excuse.

"It was… Mr. Callen, I would have expected you to inform young Mr. Hanna of the perils of such reckless behavior… NOT join in! Did we not discuss this once before as we waited for the medical personnel to cast your arm?" Hetty replied offering the others present a rare glimpse at the small family the two had once been.

Callen blushed slightly at the memory as Aiden stood chuckling just behind him. Tossing his hand back just enough to connect mildly with the boy's stomach, they could hear the "umph!" which ended the boy's laughter… but not the smile, as Callen made his excuses.

"I wouldn't have fallen had you not startled me with all the yelling. So that was kind of your fault, when you think about it." Callen finished as he caught the raised brow Hetty sported.

Sensing Deeks behind them, Callen made way for their escape, "Not that that's important... now."

"Do tell." Hetty quipped.

"Yeah, best to leave the past in the past…" Callen stated before realizing what he'd said as he caught the knowing look on her face. Rather than allow the opening for further conversation, Callen glanced at Aiden who knew exactly what Callen was about to do, "and besides, you have more important things to deal with…"

"You wouldn't." Deeks whispered as Aiden choked on his laughter.

"Deeks called you an 'Old Girl'", Callens head tilted down just slightly as his brows raised, emphasizing the importance of the information he was providing.

Hetty cast a curious glance in the direction of Deeks with a pinched expression to hide her amusement.

"That's cold man," Deeks stated as he moved behind Callen as if it offered some sort of protection.

"Survival of the fittest," Callen replied under his breath.

"Living room… NOW!" Hetty proclaimed.

Callen looked back at Aiden with a grin and as he passed Kamran, he shot her a wink that made her giggle.

"Totally worth it." Aiden breathed as they passed his father and Eric, who had come out to see what the commotion was all about.

"Totally," Callen agreed with a fist bump.

"Not fair." Deeks whined as he followed along behind.

Once they had gone into the living room, Hetty gave into the laughter she had been holding in and was soon joined by the others.

"What just happened here?" Sam asked in disbelief.

"What happened is, Mr. Callen just realized you can always come home, Mr. Hanna," Hetty stated as she pushed her glasses back into place and gave a grounding tug to her jacked before leading them all into the remainder of their evening.

Hetty watched and reveled in the familiarity of things as the team fought over light placement and then who got to put the star on top… The highlight of her evening was seeing Callen relaxed.

As the evening wound down, Callen offered to take everyone's mugs back to the kitchen when Kensi caught the look Hetty cast her direction, encouraging her to follow.


	6. Chapter 6

**AUTHOR'S NOTE****: Good Afternoon… so you liked the chapter? Couldn't you just see him gliding down that staircase? LOL. When the idea popped into my thoughts, it was as much as a done deal. I couldn't NOT think about it. Well, I hope you enjoy this one, as well. I look forward to hearing from you, if you would be so kind? **

"Here! Let me help!" Kensi called out as she followed his path to the kitchen.

She found Callen rinsing the mugs and loading them into the dishwasher.

"Anything I can do?" she asked.

"Nah, just finishing up. You need something?" he asked as he turned and leaned against the counter, drying his hands.

"Actually, I was hoping to talk to you." She asked nervously.

"Okay, well here we are... what's going on?" Callen asked curiously, crossing his arms in front of his chest.

"Tonight has been so much fun, hasn't it?"

"Yeah, I guess," he answered, shifting nervously.

"Kind of like old times, don't you think?" she suggested, noticing the relaxed features of earlier in the evening had been replaced with tense shoulders and a questioning look.

"I suppose… What is your point, Kensi?"

"My point is, I haven't seen you like this since… well, since, I can't remember when. I just don't want that to end here tonight."

"What do you want me to do, Kensi?" he asked warily.

"I want you to come to our Christmas dinner. I want you to want to come," she replied.

"We talked about this. No… no, it's for the best," he answered.

"I disagree… you are like a brother to me and I want my family around me after this past year. Just consider coming with Hetty." Kensi requested, "Is it the house? Does it feel awkward for you knowing it was your place?" she asked suddenly.

"What? NO. Kensi, I have never regretted for one moment, giving you that house. Seriously, okay? So, stop with the guilt, I'm fine." He answered, turning his back to her and folding the towel before laying it on the counter.

"Okay… then why? It's just dinner… that's all… not any different than what we did here this evening. Besides, you could always use a good homecooked meal! You're too skinny," she joked, going so far as to risk throwing a poke at his side before coming to lean against the counter he now faced so that she could see his eyes.

She watched the shadow of emotion cross his features… then a small smile, "That's something Michelle would have said." He stated, looking at her… "and I'm not skinny." He added in an effort to lighten the darkening mood.

"Agree to disagree," she replied. Callen looked out the window over the sink for a brief moment, lost in thought.

"Callen, I know you think you are doing us a favor, but trust me, you're not. We want you there. Look, we know this time of year is especially hard for you… for many reasons… allow yourself just a few hours of distraction.

He couldn't argue that Christmas was… difficult. It was a well-known fact. He also had to admit that a few hours of good food and company would be a nice break.

Callen looked over to see the hopeful look in Kensi's eyes. Her heart swelled with joy when a true trademark smirk crept across his face and his eyes brightened in color, "Okay, fine. I'll be there." He agreed, knowing he would be battling the urge to cancel… clear up to the point he knocked on their door.

Kensi grabbed him up into a tight hug. She was surprised when he didn't even flinch at the gesture.

=== NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA ===

Finally, the night's festivities came to an end. As much as Callen enjoyed the familiar comradery, he was relieved to finally have a few moments to himself. He sat by the fireplace watching the ornaments on the tree flicker with the light play from the fireplace.

He sighed as he leaned forward to place his elbows on his knees as he rolled the piece of sea glass between his fingers and thumb, completely lost in thought.

Hetty paused a moment to watch her boy before continuing her entrance to the room.

"I thought perhaps we could both use a nice cup of tea to help us wind down after all the excitement." Hetty grinned.

"Just tea?" Callen returned lightly as he leaned back in his chair to look at her.

"Would you prefer something else?" she asked in earnest.

"No, tea is perfect, thank you," came his reply.

"Mhm." Was her only reply as she set about pouring their tea, "Well, maybe not JUST tea," she said as she uncovered a plate of cookies as well.

"You spoil me, Hetty" Callen smiled warmly with his reply.

She watched as he raised his cup so he could breathe in the steam. He slowly put the cup to his lips and took the smallest of sips, tasting the offered flavor before making an effort to savor its very essence.

Callen's eyes widened as he looked over at her. She knew then that he had guessed which tea it was she served.

"Sweet floral essence and just a touch of a metallic aftertaste. Yellow Gold tea, found only in Singapore. Hetty, you are serving ME your rarest, most expensive tea?" Callen asked in surprise.

"Mr. Callen, people drink tea for many reasons… The choice of tea is as important as the ones you share it with.

"After everything… I'm surprise you didn't just give me a tea bag." Callen lowered his head.

"Really, Mr. Callen, I would never have a tea bag in my house." Hetty held her hand to her chest in mock offense.

Callen chuckled, "Okay, okay, I get it."

They sat in a mutually acceptable silence, enjoying the warmth of the fire, the flavorful tea and cookies, in comfortable companionship…

Again, Hetty noticed him fingering the sea glass.

"Might I ask what it is you are playing with?" she asked.

Callen held up the piece of glass for Hetty to see.

"The sea glass Miss Hanna gave you?" she asked, "May I?" she held out her hand expectantly.

He didn't argue, but gently laid the brilliant blue glass into her hand. He leaned back as she examined it carefully.

"It is a beautiful find. She was quite true in her comparison to your eyes when you smile." She stated, smiling as he rolled his eyes, blushing. "You know, it wouldn't hurt you to try doing that more often… smile."

"I smile," Callen argued.

"Mhm. When is the last time you remember laughing like you did this evening? When you relaxed to the point of letting your guard down?" she asked, knowingly.

When Callen didn't answer, she said no more on the subject. "Well, this was a very sweet gift," she handed it back to him and he once again began worrying it between his fingers and thumb.

"I was thinking of having it made into a necklace for her," he suggested.

"It would, indeed, make a lovely piece of jewelry. However, she did give it to YOU."

"I know, but it's too beautiful to waste sitting around in my pocket," he explained.

"I see…" she knew that what he was really saying was that he didn't deserve it. "I happen to know someone who could do that for you… if you would permit me to take this?"

Callen considered the offer, "Okay, sure. Think they can get it done in time?"

"I do… and they will do lovely work."

With a nod, he handed the glass back to her.

"I will see to it first thing tomorrow. Now, I'm going to clean up here and turn in for the night. And you, Mr. Callen?"

Callen leaned back in his chair, "Think I will stay here and let the fire go out. You go ahead, I'll clean up."

"Very well, thank you… but do try and get some rest, won't you?" Hetty smiled.


	7. Chapter 7

**AUTHOR'S NOTE****: Hello all, I just want to thank everyone for their support of this story. I do so love reading all the reviews. It is such an encouragement to the writer. It also helps keep those new stories brewing. Well, he made it through a social evening with the team… will he make it to the Christmas gathering before talking himself out of it? Take a look and let me know what your thoughts are… please.**

He watched her leave as he rose to place another log on the fire before lying down on the couch. A few hours later he found himself on his hands and knees, covered in sweat, heart pounding, head throbbing. He sat down on the floor and leaned back against the couch. Taking slow and deliberate breaths, he concentrated on the dying embers.

Six months, three years, or a decade, it didn't matter… Iosif had joined the host of other demons preventing him from ever sleeping more than a couple hours a night. If he were lucky, he would be able to catch another hour or so of sleep before the alarm.

When he felt he was once more in control, he gathered up the tray and took it to the kitchen. Once everything was properly washed, dried, and put away, he found himself wandering the halls as he worked his way up to his room. As he stepped up onto the landing of the third floor, he stopped as he felt for the key in his pocket. Crossing the hall to the room opposite his own he unlocked it. He turned the light on upon entering and winced at the brightness. While everything else had settled, the headache remained.

He slowly took in the mountain of supplies Hetty had stocked the room with, as if she knew he would be back.

Settling himself at the table he opened the drawers one by one in order to reacquaint himself with what treasures each held.

He spent the remainder of the night tinkering until finally he had laid his head down on his forearms, as he allowed them to rest on the table and fell asleep.

It was the sound of the door opening that jarred him awake.

Hetty said nothing as she set a cup of tea in front of him.

"Thank you," he offered, accepting it graciously.

"You know, there is a perfectly good bed in your room, across the hall. Might I suggest you avail yourself of it?" she stated, taking in the dark rings under his eyes.

"Sorry, Hetty, I just…"

"Nothing to apologize for… Are you hungry, Mr. Callen?" she asked warmly.

"Sure." Callen answered, knowing the truth would only get him a lecture on taking better care of himself.

"Very good. By the time you get yourself cleaned up, I should have it ready."

"Sounds good. Thank you, Hetty" he answered, pulling himself to his feet.

=== NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA ===

Callen stepped into the kitchen and was taken back by the plate full of food that awaited him.

"Hetty… I said I was hungry, not starved…" Callen joked.

"Sit down and eat, Mr. Callen. You can tell me all you want about how well you are taking care of yourself but I happen to know better. Remember, it is I who chooses the clothes you wear when you go undercover… You have lost weight and those dark circles under your eyes aren't doing much to support your argument," she looked at him over the rim of her glasses.

He didn't say another word as he set to eating the large plate of food before him.

=== NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA ===

The weekend passed quietly and come the start of the new week, Callen had assured Hetty he was capable of finding his own place.

As Christmas Eve day came to a close and everyone was leaving to start their Christmas vacation, Hetty found Callen sitting at his computer.

"Your reports are all in, Mr. Callen. Everything else can wait… go… wherever it is you intend to go to this evening." Hetty stated, "You are welcome to come to Dovecote for the evening and we could go to the Christmas dinner together…"

"Hetty, I'm fine," Callen assure her.

"Please tell me that you aren't choosing that couch over your room at Dovecote," she pointed at the couch he had claimed as his over a decade before.

"What? It's comfortable." Callen quipped.

Not to be outdone, "Well, I guess one can't expect much when your only other comparison is the floor."

"Hetty… no reason to be catty," Callen challenged.

"Very well, Mr. Callen, I shall leave you to it," Hetty turned to head down the back hall.

=== NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA ===

The next morning, as Callen finished working out in the gym, he heard the familiar beep of a text coming in on his phone. Grabbing a towel, he walked over to the bench to check the message.

"Change of plans, more room at bar. Meeting there for dinner. Remember, you promised!" Callen found himself regretting the decision for at least the hundredth time, as he read Kensi's message.

It had been another night of little sleep. He'd never admit to anyone just how much he had allowed Iosif's taunts to invade his thoughts, even now.

While he had returned to the fold and made amends, little else had changed. He still worked for the very government that had wrecked his world as a child and continued to control it to this day… if only through his work. What else could he do? Short of mercenary work, his skillset was very select and he doubted he could ever settle into an everyday job like so many of his aliases.

Still, he and the team were little more than that. The familiarity of before was simply not there and they were all struggling and it was his fault because he simply couldn't do normal. He was too damaged.

With a sigh, he headed for the locker room to shower and change before heading out.

=== NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA ===

"So, did he respond to your text at all?" Nell asked as she helped Kensi with the finishing touches for the small apartment.

"No, nothing," Kensi replied, her brow furrowed in concern.

"Well, I'm sure it's nothing. He promised he'd come," Nell assured her.

"I know… I just really want him to like the apartment." Kensi explained as she moved things around on the shelves, they had hung on the living room wall.

"And he will…" Deeks whispered in her ear, wrapping his arms around her from behind.

"Yeah?" she asked with a smile.

"yeah." was the reply.

"Here you are," Hetty stated as she entered the newly renovated apartment for the first time.

"Hetty! Merry Christmas!" Kensi greeted.

"Merry Christmas! I must say, you all are to be commended on a job well done."

"You like it?" Kensi asked uncertainly.

"It's lovely, my dear… and I am certain he will be touched by your generosity." Hetty exclaimed, being careful to hide her own uncertainty.

"You guys all up there?" Eric called up the stairs.

"Yeah, Eric, we're coming down now." Deeks answered, "We best get down there before he shows up."

Sam and the kids were the last to show other than Callen.

"Has anyone talked to him today?" Sam asked when Roberta and Julia began loading the table with their many delicacies.

"Not since I left him at the OSP last evening, I'm afraid," Hetty answered.

"He'll be here," Kamran answered confidently taking a seat at the table, making sure to save one next to her for Callen.

No one argued but followed the young girl's lead.

Just as the last of them were sitting down, they heard the back door open and shut and knew by the footsteps it was Callen.

"Hey man, you're just in time. We were just sitting down to eat." Deeks greeted warmly.

Quietly, he took the seat by Kamran, shooting her a quick smile as they said a short prayer prior to delving headlong into eating and conversation.

Julia smiled at Roberta as they looked at the satisfied smiles around the table.

"I'm going to go out on a limb and guess that we'll wait until later for dessert?" Roberta suggested to the overwhelming agreement of everyone present.

Once the kitchen was cleaned, they all gathered around the tree as everyone gradually handed out their presents until it was down to Callen.


	8. Chapter 8

**AUTHOR'S NOTE****: A little late in the day, this time. Sorry. I wanted to do a little tweaking. I hope you enjoy it. Thank you so much for the many who are reading this and for those who took the time to review when they finished. You are ALLLLLL appreciated. I have a certain set of songs on my phone that I use for inspiration when writing. I was suffering a bit of writer's block on my latest story I was working on to follow this. Now, thanks to that playlist and an idea from ****countrygirluk56****… my mind is buzzing again… so here's hoping. It's going to be a little bit before I will be posting anything but … hopefully you will still be willing to read it once I do. That's right… only one more chapter after this one and this story will be fini. Sigh. Well, here you go… enjoy the reading and drop me a wee review if you will, please.**

Explaining he didn't know what anyone really wanted, he in turn gave each member of the OSP a generous gift card.

"I wasn't sure what to get you, Aiden," He stated as he handed him his gift.

"Is that a SOG?! NICE!" Deeks commented as Aiden opened the gift and began checking it out.

Kensi took special notice of the knife. It wasn't new… she remembered back to her first days working with Callen. He always had a knife on him, even to this day. Back then, it had been that particular knife. She had asked him about it once and he would only say that someone had given it to him as a gift. He offered no names but she gathered it was someone important to him. For him to pass it on to Aiden meant something.

"Uncle G, this is so cool!" Aiden stated in awe as he and Deeks continued to check the knife over.

"Callen… there are no markings on this knife… Is this one of the ORIGINAL SOG knives used back during the Vietnam war? Deeks asked curious, "Where did you find it?"

"It was mine. Given to me by a special friend… a long time ago. Got me out of a lot of tight spots over the years. I assume your dad taught you how to handle a knife properly?" Callen asked.

"I'd say we'll be having a few more lessons. That is a bit more than a pocket knife," Sam stated. He knew why Callen gave his son the knife. He also knew it was one he had carried for years. It had seen a lot of use during that time. In fact, he hated to think of all the action that knife had seen.

Callen shot Sam a look, concerned he had overstepped his bounds. However, Sam's nod of approval put him at ease. Sam knew the knife meant something special to Callen… and his passing it on, now, to his son made it something special to him, as well.

"Thanks Uncle G! I love it!" Aiden spoke again as he showed his gift to Eric and his father.

"You're welcome. Just take good care of it and it will take good care of you…" Callen replied, relieved the gift was accepted so gratefully.

"I will, I swear." Aiden answered.

Hetty noted the look in Callen's eyes. She knew the importance that knife held for him. She knew where it had come from and she knew the history of the knife, itself. She made a mental note to take the young man aside and advise him to, perhaps, put that particular knife somewhere safe and get himself a replica for daily use. Callen wasn't one to hold onto things and gave little importance to material goods but this item was special to him… and it would break his heart should something happen to it.

Hetty then handed a gift box to Kamran. "Mr. Callen, asked my assistance with your gift, my dear."

"Uncle Callen?" Kamran looked over at him for confirmation.

"Go ahead," he replied with a shy smile.

She opened the box and gasped with shock.

Concerned, Callen quickly glanced at Hetty, who returned it with a smile of assurance.

"Uncle Callen… isn't this the sea glass I gave you?" she asked.

"Well, yes. I just…" he began nervously when Hetty interrupted.

"Mr. Callen suggested that because that particular piece was such a beautiful and rare find, it deserved to be shown off… Oh, and Mr. Callen, this one is for you. My friend had enough to do a little something extra." Hetty offered a similar box to Callen.

Kamran moved closer so she could see what his gift contained. Callen looked down to find a key chain to match Kamran's necklace.

"They match!" Kamran cried out excitedly.

"Yes, they sure do," Callen replied as he looked up at Hetty with a grateful nod.

"The glass is turquoise. An incredibly rare color to find, let alone on that particular beach. It's been paired with a starfish. They each have something in common." Hetty smiled as she saw the same curious look on both of their faces, "Sea glass is a magical creation, not unlike the starfish. Both symbolize renewal and healing. The creation of sea glass is a long journey of discovery. It begins one thing and then when it appears its purpose is no longer valid, it's cast aside and forgotten. As it's thrown into the fray, beaten, broken, but all the while, tossed and tumbled until the rough jagged exterior has been smoothed and reshaped… given a NEW purpose. It ceases to matter what it was before because its present no longer resembles that of the past in any way." Hetty paused as she looked pointedly at Callen before she continued on, "The starfish may face many a battle, but once the battle ends… the healing begins as it regrows that which it lost. Nearly every facet of its being can be rejuvenated and regenerated, giving it a fresh new look both inside and out. What a wonderful reminder to us all. Regardless of the battles we face… we, too, are capable of softening the damaged feelings and scars while regenerating new thoughts and habits… focusing on a new purpose."

The story wasn't lost on any of them, especially Callen, who bowed his head and concentrated on the key chain.

"Thank you, Uncle Callen… It's very beautiful… I love it." She spoke softly as she leaned her head against his arm.

"Yeah?" he asked simply.

"Yeah." She whispered back, "Will you put it on me?" she requested.

Callen too the necklace and very gently attached the clasp and moved it around to the back of her neck. Once again, she looked down at the pendent before giving him a hug and running to show if off to everyone.

Callen once again looked up at Hetty, who had moved to sit next to him, "Thank you" he held the keychain up to emphasize his appreciation.

"You are very welcome."

"She appears to like hers as well." He stated, watching as Sam inspected the necklace.

"It would seem both of the Hanna children have found their gifts more than likable." She agreed, "That was quite the gift you offered the young Mr. Hanna. Are you certain you want to part with it?"

Callen thought a moment, perhaps remembering the person who had gifted it to him… "Yeah, I'm not going to ever have anyone to hand it down to… Aiden is a good kid and he will respect it and appreciate its history."

"You haven't yet shared with him its history… will you?" Hetty asked curiously.

Callen sat back and watched the team huddle around the kids, "I was referring to the military history behind the knife. To what you are referring? One day, maybe. It's not important he knows that in order to appreciate the knife itself."

"Aw, you are correct… however, the value is not always just about the item but the person who held that item before them…" Hetty offered softly before she, too, settled back and watched the group before them.

"I'm very grateful to you for agreeing to come today." Hetty added.

"Kensi makes it hard to say no," he admitted quietly with a chuckle.

"Indeed" Hetty smiled, "Going back to Aiden's gift, if we might. I was a little surprised when you chose to give that particular knife to Aiden instead of Kensi."

Callen looked at Hetty before turning back to watch the group, "I thought about it… it just seemed right. I think she would have agreed."

"Will you ever tell her the story of where you got that knife?" Hetty asked curiously.

Callen leaned back into the sofa and thought for a moment, "I don't know… maybe… someday… I don't think it's something that needs to be brought up at this point, do you?"

Hetty, too, put some thought into her answer before shaking her head, "no, I don't think so… one day perhaps, when the time is right."

She left the conversation at that. It was a small world… sometimes, too small… lives crisscrossed and intertwined so unexpectedly sometimes, to the point that it amazed even her.

"Hey, Callen," Deeks called out as he headed for the back hall, "There's something I wanted to show you that we've been working on… you gotta minute?"

Callen glanced at Hetty questioningly and she simply shook her head in mock confusion.

"Okay." He pulled himself up to follow Deeks.

The others waited until they cleared the top step before quietly following.

Reaching the small landing at the top of the stairs, Deeks pulled a key from his pocket and began unlocking the door.

"We started fixing up the bar and realized what a great space we had up here and it was being wasted for mere storage so we decided to turn it into something more." He opened the door and ushered him into the apartment.

"Okay," Callen looked at Deeks questioningly as he passed him.

Standing in the space, he said little at first… unsure of what he was looking at.

The first room they entered was the kitchen. It wasn't big but it was user friendly… well thought out and contained everything needed to make cooking easy, 'if one knew HOW to cook,' Callen thought to himself.

"I'm not exactly sure what I'm supposed to be looking at… you turned it into an apartment… so, what, you are going to be a landlord, too, now?" Callen asked.

"In a matter of speaking." Deeks replied, beginning to get nervous.

"I mean, it looks great… who did the work, you? As I seem to recall, you suggested you would rather pay someone to do the work while you sat by the pool somewhere sipping a mojito…" Callen joked.

"Well, yeah… but this was different and I did have some help… a lot, actually," he grinned as Callen followed his gaze and looked behind him to find the rest of the team.

"What's going on?" Callen asked, now on alert.

"We wanted you to see the finished product."

"The finished product? Sooooo…" trying to put two and two together.

"Well, yeah, I did the cabinets… Nice, huh?" Sam asked proudly.

"Yeah? How long did THESE take you?" Callen again joked in reference to the cabinets he had once built for Michelle.

"Funny, G… very funny." Sam retorted.

"You did nice work, Sam" Callen replied sincerely.

"Come on," Kensi hooked her arm through his, "I want to show you the rest. Nell helped me decorate it."

Kensi pulled him through each room of the apartment, pointing out all the amenities, "Fully furnished!"

"I see that… so what's going on here. Are you trying to tell me you don't like the house and you are going to be moving in here?" Callen asked.

"What? No, we love the house!" Deeks replied.

"Then what's the deal with the apartment?"

"Come here" Kensi encouraged.

Leading him into the living room, Callen's eyes were drawn to the wall above the T.V. stand, decorated with hanging shelves filled with pictures they had salvaged from the house, all with new frames. One such frame held the picture of the team. One shelf, he noticed, had remained empty but for a small epiphyte plant. Callen could still hear Hetty's voice, "It doesn't require soil, you don't need to water it. It absorbs moisture from the air. It doesn't even need roots, but it makes it more stable."

"I don't understand." Callen stated turning to look at the room full of people.

**AUTHOR'S NOTE****: I have read and searched until my eyes hurt, looking for a knife that Callen would have, that would have a story behind it and would make giving it to Aiden all that more special. Now, I don't know if, in fact, any of these particular knives are still in circulation, let alone being used… so it is for story telling purposes only… Therefore, please don't scold me if you know otherwise. LOL! If you know something more about that knife… I love learning new things, drop me a note. HA! Just know, I did my best and this one just struck my fancy. Okay, that is all. Onward, people... see YOU for the**** last chapter, TOMORROW!**


	9. Chapter 9

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**** Last chapter! Here we go. **

"Callen, we all worked together to renovate this apartment for YOU!" Nell explained.

Callen looked around the group, "Wait, what? You built this apartment for me. Why?" he asked sincerely confused.

"Well, for one, you have nowhere to live." Sam stated.

"I have… options," Callen replied.

"We wanted to give you an actual home." Kensi stated, "Not just options."

"Why?" Callen asked again.

"Because you deserve it." Eric answered, "You always have everyone else's backs. Well, this is us… having yours."

"You referred to your house as just that… a house… not a home." Deeks pointed out.

"You spent your whole life looking for a home… some place where you'd feel loved and wanted and appreciated. A place where friends get together and share their lives with each other. We wanted you to feel that … to know… without a shadow of a doubt, that you are loved and wanted… here." Kensi added, smiling.

"Yeah, Sam built all the cabinets, Kensi and Nell designed the layout for the place and decorated it. Mamas Deeks and Feldman here, stocked the kitchen with all things good, Eric took care of security and I was the one who put the walls, floors, and ceiling in." Deeks explained.

Callen looked to Hetty.

"It's all them, my boy. I had no idea," Hetty confirmed the unasked question.

Callen walked through the rest of the apartment once more. There were two bedrooms and a bathroom with a built-in laundry. They had thought of everything.

"Callen."

Turning to find that it was Roberta Deeks who was invading his thoughts. He smiled, "What can I do for you?" he asked politely.

"You know, I have watched this crew ever since you left. I know you don't need to hear one more person tell you they made mistakes… but you should know how much they missed you, worried about you. They wanted you to be here for the wedding so badly. Kensi was going to ask you to walk her down the aisle, did you know that?" she asked softly.

Callen simply shook his head, sadly.

"When they heard you were in trouble, they were ready and willing when the time came to get you and when you finally came back, all they wanted was to be your family. I understand you never had a home with a real family. Family loves you every minute of every day. They may not always like you, but they will always, always love you. They will also let you down, hurt your feelings and you will do the same. But that love… that feeling you get right here," she pointed to her chest before reaching out and touching his chest, "that feeling doesn't change, because you are family. You may have left and maybe for good reason, but you were still family. You watched out for them and kept them safe and they watched and waited… they kept the lights on."

Callen said nothing at first… he looked around once more, "I don't understand why… I mean, I do… but after everything… I simply didn't think they wanted me here after all that went down on that mission with Marty… I didn't know what else to do to make it right, so I left. Now… so much has changed… I have changed… and not for the better, I assure you." He glanced at the woman, unsure of why he was telling her any of it… "I nearly got your son killed… why do you care?" running his hand through his short-cropped hair, he sighed, "I was here for their wedding, you know… I just don't know if I can ever be who they want me to be. I am so damaged, I know that… I just…"

"I heard them talking about you being there, at a distance… I also know that you were not the reason my son was shot… the second time." She offered a little smirk of her own, "No one, but you, blames you. As for damaged, hunny, who of us ain't damaged? We all have our own baggage. You just have more than most and it's time you put some of that baggage down and leave it behind… They did this for you… I'd say they're trying to tell you something and hey, you'll never starve while I'm around…" she chuckled.

"Well, that right there is a very good selling point," he smiled, raising his head as he took in a deep breath while looking around the room once more as he nervously chewed his inner lip.

He sighed inwardly. Decision made, he moved to join the others, stopping briefly to give Roberta a small kiss on the cheek.

"Don't take this as a complaint, but what was that for?" she smiled at him.

He chuckled, "Thank you."

They were waiting when Callen returned, "Soooooo" Deeks hinted.

"What are you thinking in way of rent?" Callen asked, all business.

"Rent? Oh, yeah, no… we aren't asking for any." Deeks responded.

"Deeks…"

"No, seriously, Callen. My mom will be running this place and will be here late. Knowing you will be here if she needs someone is worth more than any rent." Deeks answered honestly.

Callen's eyes narrowed as he considered their gift, "It's a nice place and you all did a great job… you didn't leave anything to chance…okay."

"Yeah?" Kensi asked, slightly surprised.

"Yeah. Thank you… seriously." His eyes were bright as everyone congratulated him on his new place.

Kamran looked at her necklace and then back to her Uncle Callen, "See?! I told you! Same color! Your eyes are smiling again."

Everyone laughed at that.

"I'd say now is as good a time as any for dessert, shall we?" Julia chimed in as she and Roberta headed for the stairs as the others followed.

Sam held back for a moment as Callen looked at all the pictures once more.

"I'd offer to help you move in but I know it would only be that duffel and your bedroll."

"I had a few things Hetty put into storage, but I am pretty sure they are already here," he chuckled, before turning to face his partner. "Only thing missing here, today, is Michelle."

"Yeah… It's hard man. I miss her so much," Sam admitted, "But, hey, she'd be proud of you. It's been a long road and I know you are still struggling to put that time as a Renegade in your closet with all those other less than friendly aliases… but you aren't alone. You don't have to fight this battle alone anymore."

Callen again worried the inside of his cheek. Clearing his throat, he changed the subject. You and Deeks really did a great job with the place and the girls went all out.""

"Kensi may be a bad ass in the field and a hoarder in the office, but she's still a woman and they like shopping and decorating."

"Better not let her hear you talk like that." Callen replied jokingly.

A big grin broke out on Sam's face, "yeah. No kidding… you noticed the empty shelf over there? That's for the tea box. They made certain it would have a special place.

"I noticed… it means a lot." Called replied.

"Hey! You best be hurrying up or Eric's gonna eat your pie!" Deeks yelled up the steps.

"That's your landlord, now…" Sam laughed.

"Yeah… don't remind me." Callen quipped, "However, his mom's alright… and she likes to cook."

"True…" Sam agreed, thankful for the fact that Roberta would be around to see to it that his partner ate something healthy once in a while.

"Guess we better head down." Callen said, listening to the chatter from the team.

"Welcome home, brother," Sam clapped him on the back as he pulled him in for a brotherly hug.

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**** Well, this is where we leave it. I promised back in "On the Other Side of Fear Lies Freedom" that I would put them back to rights… I just had no clue we would be 5 stories in before it all got smoothed back out. LOL. This story took on a life of its own. It's been a lot of fun. I hope you enjoyed the ride. Last chance to leave a review and let me know your thoughts. If you have ideas for where you want the characters to go from here… share with me… I'm always looking for new ideas for stories. As you can see… my version of the series has taken a few different directions than the show, itself… soooooo, hey, I got the beach wedding right… yay. Okay, thanks for reading… till next time… **


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